Keeping it Real

It’s Over: How to Move On

Your heart may be broken now, but it will heal. Time is the key.

When relationships break down, those involved often feel not only heartbroken but humiliated and rejected as well. And yet this pain can be withstood, no matter how bad it may seem. Approached in the right spirit, you will emerge stronger and wiser.

1) You must grieve

The emotions triggered by a relationship breakdown often resemble those of grief. As with the death of a loved one, you will need time to adjust to their absence. Don’t repress the emotion; cry, scream, and yell. Do whatever you must to release the pain.

2) Learn to be alone

For some, the end of a relationship brings opportunities for self-exploration and self-growth. Those least able to cope often find it difficult not because they miss their lover but because they cannot face being alone. That is not healthy. Inevitably, such individuals throw themselves into new relationships, often with unsuitable people, simply to avoid loneliness. Instead, try to see this as a chance to grow. Embrace your new life. Get to know yourself before you meet someone new. If possible, get away somewhere different for a week or two; perhaps you could call up old friends, take up a new hobby, or explore a spiritual practice.

3) Learn to like yourself