Keeping it Real

4 Signs You’re Dating A Dud

You probably already know if he’s a dud, but just in case…

During the dating process, you come to know who someone is. During this time you may realize that the man you’re dating doesn’t live up to your expectations. Here are four signs that you are dating a dud.

1. He asks to borrow money

If the man you’re dating asks to borrow money, you are dating a financial dud. It’s true that we can all have hard times, but you aren’t the one that he should be coming to for money. He should ask his friends and family before he ever asks you. If he’s asked them and they said no, you might have to consider that it’s a risky move to lend him money.

2. He’s not ambitious

Not everyone has dreams of owning a large house, traveling the world, or moving up in their career, but having some ambition is an attractive quality. If you’re dating a man who works a minimum wage job that he’s happy in, that’s great, but will he still be there in five or ten years? Ambition isn’t only about money and possession. Someone who is ambitious can set personal goals for themselves such as running a marathon or taking a course to learn something new. Ambition comes in many forms, but someone who is not ambition will seem to lack interest in everything and have no goals for his life.

3. He doesn’t compromise

You might be dating a dud if he is unwilling to compromise. When you’re in a relationship, compromise is necessary. No couple wants the same thing one hundred percent of the time. This means that compromises will have to be made. If your boyfriend refuses to do anything he doesn’t want to, this is an act of selfishness. When you’re in a relationship, both people need to care enough about the other enough to compromise when there is a difference of opinion.

4. He puts you down

A man who has to put you down to feel better about himself is a dud. A man that you’re involved with should never call you names or make you feel less than the best. He should make you feel like you’re special and offer to help when you need it. A man who loves and respects you will never put you down in any way.

Dating a man with any of the above qualities might be a sign that he’s a dud. Depending on what you’re looking for in a man, these qualities may or may not matter much. Not everyone wants a partner with ambition, but never feel guilty for wanting someone with their shit together. You have the right to date the kind of man you want regardless of what he has to offer.

If you don’t want to date a dud, you don’t have to. If you’re only interested in what he looks like, how big his muscles are, or that he’s good in bed… that too is your choice. – Tina T.