Keeping it Real

4 Signs You Depend on the Man in Your Life Too Much

Being in a stable and healthy relationship is a wonderful thing.

But if you depend on your boyfriend for too much, it can create tension between the two of you. Here are four signs you might be too dependent on the man in your life.

You need his approval to feel good about yourself

If you only feel good about yourself when a man tells you how smart, pretty or well-dressed you are, you need to change your thinking process. You need to learn how to feel like an amazing woman without a man telling you that you are. You should be able to look in the mirror and see a beautiful, confident woman staring back at you.

You should be able to celebrate your achievements without anyone else telling you how great you did because you should already know that. It’s nice to have other people acknowledge the things you’ve done, but you should never rely on them to make the things you’ve achieved meaningful or to be happy.

You let him pay for everything

You might be dating the nicest guy on earth, but that doesn’t mean you have to let him pay for everything. He can love you more than anything, but proof of that is not in how much he spends on you. If you don’t have a lot of money or you don’t work, this is not a good enough excuse for not paying for anything.

It’s important that you not only stand on your own two feet but share in the finances. This applies to dates, groceries and even rent. Not only will this make you feel like more of an equal in the relationship, but it shows your man that he is more to you than just a meal-ticket.

You text him all day

It’s acceptable to text the man in your life to see how his day is going or to share a piece of good news. It becomes a problem if you text him constantly throughout the day and expect him to reply every time. Then get upset if he doesn’t text you back instantly. Unless he doesn’t have a job, go to school or have any hobbies, a man is not going to be able to entertain you all day.

Needing to be in touch with your man every moment of the day gives the impression that you have nothing else to do with your time. Your man might start to feel smothered or that you don’t trust him. Besides what do you have to talk about when you’re face to face if you text him all day?

You run all decisions past him

If you require your boyfriend’s opinion on everything you do in your life, you are probably too dependent on him. It’s fine to ask his opinion sometimes, but if you make all your life decisions based on what he thinks, if you ever break up you’ll be up-the-creek without a paddle. You need to learn to trust yourself, not all your decisions will be the correct ones, but that’s life. We all make mistakes, and we learn from those mistakes.

You can’t live your life afraid to make the wrong decision, and it’s not fair to put the burden of your life choices on your boyfriend’s shoulders. Especially if you blame him for decisions, he made that didn’t go the way you wanted them to. Your opinion is the opinion that matters the most when it comes to your life. Also, your man might start to become irritated that you can’t seem to think for yourself.

Making your boyfriend feel wanted and needed isn’t based on how dependent you are on him. You don’t want him to feel responsible for your entire life. Show your man that you are an independent and confident woman who stands on her own two feet. Most good men find a woman who can hold her own sexy and desirable. Besides, you can be a woman who is independent and confident and still be in a good relationship. -Tina T.